meet: The Bandage Dress. this has become my latest obsession. vain, yes! trite, yes! am i in lust with this beautiful Herve Leger knockoff? you betcha!!!!! oh be still my beating heart, this is the thing that has kept me awake at night, drooling over W magazine and online InStyle. this gorgeous beauty is the reason why i ditched the spanx and didn't hold back on my pizza last night.
bc this beauty? it will hold in places on your body you thought were left for the dogs. bc there was NO way i thought my thighs would ever 'smooth' or 'contour evenly' and this dress? while it's meant for those who aren't completely out of shape, it is FORGIVING. and for this? oh, i love thee, bandage dress.
tonight i'm going shopping and damnit, i am DETERMINED to spend money on myself. bc i never, ever do. i am a shopaholic gone broke. i obsess over fashions and trends and yet i mostly stick to the 'classic' look which consists of a staple handbag (that was pricey, i might add, but i've worn it daily for over 2 years so i think the investment was worth it) black, black, and more black, and either birkenstocks, black pointy heels or flip flops. and lots of long drape-y necklaces and earrings bc those? don't cost too much. oh and nail polish. bc a good manicure can take you anywhere, baby.
but tonight, tonight is different. i am going to buy a bandage dress, damnit, bc tomorrow night? we're going downtown for a friends birthday celebration and i am so tired of wearing the same outfits out. i want to look GOOD. and this is probably the last time i can do so without breaking my neck, bc once the snow hits? oh, you can forget about wearing cute dresses and heels, honey, bc once that ice is on the ground only an earthquake could get me out of my house. and then only in Uggs.
so anyway. tonight, i am shopping. tonight? i want to find this dress. and tonight, i want to find a KILLER pair of platform heels. bc i? am going to look smokin'. even if it kills me.